While it might not be a case of too much alcohol, if you're like me, you may have spent years in and out of a different kind of AA – "Accomplishment Addiction."
That place where we get stuck in a life of busy-ness, or we fall prey to FOMO aka
the "fear of missing out" on something else. So we do
even more. Hoping, trying, praying that maybe this next thing will bring some relief... but it doesn’t.
If you’re constantly adding to your accomplishment list, yet still feeling dissatisfied or unfulfilled, this might be just the intervention you’ve been looking for.
Accomplishment addiction is what happens when we believe we’re not enough, and that each brand new object, course, or product that comes our way is just the thing
we think we’re missing to make us feel smart enough, worthy enough, deserving enough, and whole. Listen up: It is you and your beliefs that create your world and so it is only you and your beliefs that can change your world.
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5 Ways to Break Accomplishment Addiction:
1. Create a self-appreciation practice
Too many of us so are caught up in a trap of doing
that we never step back to think about how
we’re doing. When we’re in a cycle of constant busy-ness it’s difficult to ever feel deeply satisfied with ourselves because well, we just keep on doing, without coming up for air.
So every now and then, stop and take some time to appreciate yourself. As you get into bed each night, ask yourself “What is it about me as a human being that I love?” They can be big or small things, but start identifying 3 - 5 things each day that make you proud to be who you are.
For instance, do you love the way you put yourself together in the mornings? The thought you put into your kids’ lunch boxes? The way you helped the elderly lady with that thing she couldn’t reach at the grocery store today, or the awesome presentation you put together at work this week? It’s the beliefs you have about yourself that create who you are, and the more you believe things to be true, they become
true. So take the time to realize in how many ways you are already enough, without having to do
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2. Create the space for stillness
When we become still for even a small portion of the day we harmonise with the Universe. As I wrote in my article The Real Reason You Should Be Meditating, meditation in any form, is a simple way to break up the energy stream of constantly trying, yet feeling you’re not getting anywhere. It also allows you to get out from under your do-do trap and notice your intuition guiding you to what’s truly important to you, instead of the bright shiny things you think you should be doing thanks to someone else’s perfectly Instagrammed life.
I wonder what would happen if social media came with a mandatory medical warning slashed across their sites that read “WARNING: Comparison steals joy… and your life.”?!
3. Get clear on what lights you up and turns you on
And focus on doing more of that. Listen to what feels good in your body and bones. We’re not here to struggle under a weight of accomplishing things that appear to look amazing under someone else’s social feed filter. We’re a soul choosing to have a human experience for a little while, here to experience as much joy as possible. Allow your soul to express to you what’s in your heart and act on that.
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4. Unsubscribe from what doesn’t serve you and light you up
Exhausted from trying to keep up with everything that comes through your inbox? Start unsubscribing from all those newsletters you never read. Say no to invites and events you don’t really want to go to. Being half-hearted about something is far more exhausting than finding the strength to say a gentle but clear “No, thank you”. And switch off from social media. It’s not living in the moment. It’s living in someone else’s.
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5. Live by the 100% rule
I recently heard a piece of gold while listening in on a webinar by Susie Moore, for the launch of her brilliant first book What If It Does Work Out? (2016). She shared a piece of advice a friend had given her, initially about sugar. “What’s easier, eating 2 M&Ms or …none?!” Ha! Ain’t that the truth. She went on to explain the idea stems from Jack Canfield’s rule: 99% Is a B*tch - 100% Is a Breeze. In other words when we 99% something it’s exhausting and stressful. But when we commit wholeheartedly to something our life actually becomes easier – it becomes crystal clear what we need to focus on and what we no longer have to try to juggle, because we commit to completing something fully.
When you decide to put 100% of your energy into one thing at one time, you’re not looking out for the next brand new thing that leaves you wanting more. Because you’re too busy polishing what you have right in front of you —with the kind of gusto that leads to deep satisfaction and fulfilment.
Emma Bathie is a Soul Happiness Coach. Learn more about her work and how to create more of life's meaning and magic here.
WATCH on Z Living: Namaste Yoga, a calming workout for body and soul. Join hosts Kate Potter, Erica Blitz and a cast of experienced yogis as they guide you through a morning yoga flow sure to start your day off right. Get a sneak peek here.
Tell us in the comments: Do you feel addicted to accomplishments? How have you handled it?