Change Your Money Mindset: How Your Beliefs Dictate Your Financial Behavior

by Emma Bathie

Tax season is upon us now, but good money management is a skill for every single day. This is part one of a three-part series about responsible money management featuring female financial trailblazers Denise Duffield-Thomas and Kate Northrup. See part two here. See part three here.

Here's How Deeply-Held Beliefs Can Dictate Your Attitude And Behavior Toward Money:


It wasn’t until my husband and I separated 8 years ago that I ever began stressing about money or my financial future. At that point I suddenly started to believe I wasn’t going to be able to do this ”money thing” on my own. It was the boogieman that kept me up past midnight and woke me around 3.30am every morning, keeping me in a chokehold until the first rays of dawn broke outside. The light would momentarily allow me to wrangle free of my fears so I could find another half hour or so of sleep before it was time to go wake my sleeping babies and pretend Mama had it altogether.

Before my husband and I separated and even before we got together, I’d always been able to create and earn good money and make sound investments. I didn’t consciously give much thought to money or to two-, five- or 10-year plans because life was about living in the moment, and I believed that anything at anytime was possible. 

Also on Z Living: Learn good money management weekly by tuning into Z Living's popular show House Poor, which features homeowners with a large house debt and finds practical ways to help ease the burden. Watch House Poor Thursdays at 4 PM. Find out where to watch the show here.

I Believed In My Ability To Earn And Manage Money. Then I Lost My Way.

 

If I wanted a particular job, I went after it and got it. Even when we had to move around the middle of Europe due to my husband’s training schedule and I couldn’t speak the local language. I could manifest business-class upgrades at the drop of a hat, not that they were important, but a fun indicator I was in flow. I instigated finding us dream property investments, not because it was part of any plan, but because it was fun and I believed it was possible. I found and applied for new jobs for him so that we could move back to my hometown in Australia after we started a family… financially at least, life was all in beautiful flow. 

Then, let’s say we lost our way. And I, my self-belief. Instead of living with ease, grace and flow, I began riding waves of guilt, shame and quiet desperation for leaving a relationship that appeared on the outside to have everything going for it. For being the first one in my family to be heading for divorce and for wanting to live a life in which I felt fully expressed in my soul’s reason for being here. And for believing I could find a relationship that supported that.

It took me quite a while to realize that my beliefs were the cornerstone to everything, but thanks to the work of the following amazing women I was able to get my head back on straight and kick those money gremlins that were going to have me living on the street, curbside.

Also on Z Living: 5 Money Practices To Put You On The Path To Prosperity

How I Turned My Financial Life Around Via Two Financial Trailblazers You Need To Know About: 


Money gurus Denise Duffield-Thomas and Kate Northrup teach women how to create financial freedom and manifest the life they want by releasing money blocks, creating loving money habits, and providing a fresh perspective on self-love and worth. I am excited to introduce you to their work in this article and to let you know that you’ll be hearing more about them in upcoming interviews.

Meet Money Guru Denise Duffield-Thomas:


Duffield-Thomas was my first ever coach when I began searching my life purpose and it was through her that I began learning about the Law of Attraction. She was the one who taught me I was fully responsible for what I was attracting into my “dark” place, and that I could again find my happy place of ease and flow around money once my beliefs, or rather my blocks, were uncovered. (Photo courtesy Denise Duffield-Thomas)

It’s our “blocks," specifically ones relating to money, that most manifesting teachers don’t address. They’ll tell you to get laser focused on what you want and to only focus on that, but unless you uncover what’s holding you back from manifesting the kind of life you want, you won’t ever be able to create it. 

Duffield-Thomas is known as the “Lucky Bitch” from manifesting for herself an incredible life using the principles of the Law of Attraction. It began with manifesting a bank error in her favor to cover her University tuition just days before it was due, winning a scholarship to her life coaching qualification, a six month, all-expenses-paid travel staying in five-star hotels in 12 countries around the world worth $500,000, a book publishing course and more. You can read about how she manifested all this in her book Lucky Bitch: A Guide For Exceptional Women To Create Outrageous Success (2012). 

But, as she says, she was still dead broke and was left wondering how on earth could she be simultaneously so lucky and have no money – her big breakthrough was understanding it was her money blocks that were holding her back, and this is what she now very successfully teaches women from all over the world in her second book Get Rich, Lucky Bitch! Release Your Money Blocks and Live a First Class Life (2013) and through her signature course, the Lucky Bitch Money Boot Camp.

Also on Z Living: This Is What It Means To Live Beyond Your Means

Denise Duffield-Thomas On Money Blocks — And How To Change Them.


She says that we’re all already smart enough, creative enough, the right size, color and gender. What stops us is what we believe, or don’t believe around money – our money blocks:

Your money blocks are your own personal brand of sabotage.” 

Curious to know what your money blocks could be? You can listen in to a free workshop on her 7 money blocks or download Denise’s practical manifesting cheat sheet, at LuckyBitch.com. Although her blog focuses on women in business, her weekly articles on money and manifesting will have you feeling like you’re sitting down having coffee with a bestie who always has your back. It’s not surprising that her Lucky Bee posse (now with over 3,500 Lucky Bitch Money Boot Camp members) is considered one of the best places to be on the Internet for women wanting to raise their money consciousness and transform their economy-class mindset into a first class life.

Also on Z Living: How To Feel Abundant Even With A Drawer Full Of Bills

Meet Money Guru Kate Northrup:


Another woman who is a trailblazer for women in the area of money is Kate Northrup, who teaches us another way of looking at and handling our relationship with money. In her book Money: A Love Story, Untangle Your Financial Woes and Create the Life You Really Want (2013), she shows us how to take away the drama, guilt and shame many of us women feel around money and create a love story with it instead. 

Whether you’re in debt up to your eyeballs or feel you totally have your financial act together, the exercises she takes you through in this book will show you how to dig deep and work through the resistance that will always come up at some point in our relationship with money from a point of forgiveness and self-acceptance. (Photo courtesy Kate Northrup)

Also on Z Living: Are You 'House Poor'? 5 Reasons Why & 5 Solutions

Kate Northrup On Self Love And The Money Lies We Tell Ourselves.


Northrup's work focuses on the money lies we tell ourselves and how to break the cycle, which include thought patterns like:

  1. "Someone else should and will do this for me." If you’ve ever caught yourself thinking that one day your Prince Charming will come along and sort you, Northrup wants you to know you are already enough, on your own, to turn on your full potential and get your financial life flowing all by yourself.
  2. "I’m not good with money." Tell yourself this lie for long enough and you’ll be right. I love the first baby step that Northrup teaches around this – start by checking in with your bank balance, daily. Knowing what is going on in there is the first step to dealing with it!
  3. "People with money are greedy." Or, "It’s not spiritual to have money or to be rich." Ok, we’ve all been guilty of this one at some stage. But if we’re busy judging others for having more than we do, how are we ever going to feel ok having more ourselves? Northrup teaches us that money is a “value” exchange, and when we add value to someone’s life, it’s actually a spiritual act, in that if someone has a need that we can fill with something honest and valuable, it becomes an act of service, and deserves to be paid for.
  4. "I’m not [fill in the blank] enough." Whenever we don’t see ourselves as enough of anything, we take ourselves out of the game. We cannot expect others to see value in us if we cannot see it for ourselves. As Northrup says:

“No one will value you more than you value yourself.” Amen. 

So how do we do that? With more self-love. What I love about Northrup is that she will also eye-roll at this point because she knows how important self-love is, and that many of us are probably also eye-rolling and internally throwing our hands up, thinking, “what does that even mean?!”

One of the practical exercises Northrup teaches is to start building our self-love muscle and to see all the places where we are more than enough by journaling for 21 days. In every entry, she says, write down three things you value about yourself or three ways you added value to someone’s life. (Remember, adding value to someone’s life can be even through a small act of kindness or by simply offering someone a smile!) Try it yourself, it truly helps.

Northrup is someone who not only teaches women to stand on their own two feet through banishing the lies we tell ourselves and creating more loving money habits, but also teaches women how to build profitable businesses that pay them residual income – income that comes in over and over again for work that is done once.

One thing I know for sure through studying these women is that when you’re in line with your highest good and your soul’s mission, the world can’t wait to financially reward you for it. And these two women are definitely on fire examples of that.

Also on Z Living: 3 Smart Tips To Track Your Cash

What's One Money Belief Holding You Back?


Now we’d love to hear from you. What’s one money belief you know is holding you back, or what’s one way you know you are sabotaging yourself from getting ahead financially? How will you turn that around? Then, be on the lookout for the individual interviews we’ll be doing with Denise Duffield-Thomas and Kate Northrup so you can learn more about their work and their suggestions on how to uncover your money blocks and increase your financial freedom.

Read more from this series:

Emma Bathie is a Soul Happiness Coach. Learn more about her work and how to create more of life's meaning and magic HERE.

Want more financial advice? Don't miss House Poor, only on Z Living. Missed an episode, or don't yet get Z Living from your provider? Watch it now by signing up for Z Living GO, where you can watch all the episodes plus live TV — you'll get a free 30-day trial.  

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